Poems: Cobblestone Calamities

A collection of 30 poems inspired by Mojang’s hugely successful and addictive game Minecraft.

Illustrated Edition now available - see sidebar for details!

 Kids of all ages (5 – 95!) will find enjoyment in the verses contained behind the skillfully painted cover art of this little book. Let not the high-brow artistry of the cover fool you – the poetry is written to be accessible to everyone who’s played and loved Minecraft.

From the chilling tale of The Ballad of Herobrine;

…So wrapt is he in the rhythmic chore
He barely hears the rustle;
He cocks his head with steadied hand
And stills his miner’s muscle.

Naught but the wind does carry through
the caves to where he’s working;
But something stirs within the night,
Some evil here is lurking…

To the poignant story of the ever-hated Cobblestone block;

…Oh! Such horrors have I seen!
From Timbuctoo to Tatooine!
Plains and plains of sandstone sprawls,
Dirt holes, gold walls, I’ve seen them all!…

Cobblestone Calamities will take you through the trials and tribulations that every Minecrafter has faced in their adventures through blocky wonderland.

  • “Read one to my daughter (4), and she insisted I read all of them! Quite a feat, without pictures.”
  • “My girls have read your poems. They both enjoyed them a lot. They are aged 14 & 11.”
  • “He said he liked it. Especially the one about the Gast. Very good.”
  • “Grrrrl, you got mad word skills! The poems are amazing and certainly anyone of any age who plays the game will identify with the scenarios you’re describing.”
  • “Just read them all to him as his bedtime story. Some words a bit big for him, and I had to explain PVP and Spleef to him, but he loved Fred the Silverfish and the skellies and zombies =)”
  • “Got a sneak peek at @WelshPixie s Minecraft poetry. It’s hilarious! Love it!” – Carnalizer

Digital Download:

Non-Illustrated version available as a PDF file and EPUB (for Kindle) for $3!

After completing the PayPal payment you will be redirected to a download page.

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ILLUSTRATED VERSION available from Smashwords for $5!

Click Here to Buy


Non-Illustrated version available via lulu.com for £4.50 / $7.09 (sorry, weird conversion rate!)

Support independent publishing: Buy this book on Lulu.

ILLUSTRATED VERSION available via lulu.com for £9.67 / $17.49 (sorry again for the weird conversion rate…) printed  with seven beautiful full-colour sketches by Pookkah! 

Support independent publishing: Buy this book on Lulu.

All comments and reviews are greatly appreciated. Thank you for your support – enjoy the poems!

  • Definitely waiting for the illustrated version. That’s so awesome.

  • Faithfulcupid

    Looks great! Well done!

  • Leebee

    Got the download, it’s awesome. I’m waiting for the illustrated version before I buy the hard copy.
    The Ballad of Herobrine is terrific,it’s so atmospheric.
    Dinner made me laugh out loud, and I’m still laughing after reading the Limericks. And everyone should own a silverfish like Fred, I’m off to the pet shop tomorrow to see if I can get me one!
    Nice one Del.

  • SellaturcicaArt

    It sounds like a really cute book! I do, however, want to wait for the illustrated version, can’t wait! 🙂